Hearts

These past two days, I've realized that I have a hard heart. One that consist of mulitple amounts of tough layering. It isn't that I don't care, but I think I've grown accustomed to the idea that life moves on and time waits for no one. So why waste a good and important thing on something that apparently wasn't meant to be yours. Over the years, I've learned to let go and let God. I've been through so many situations where I would work my ass off for something, to get something, to earn something only to come up short and not receive it. I mean, yeah shit sucks but sometimes you just gotta face the facts that God has something better planned, something even better in store for you. All you have to do is wait. And even with that, you can't be expecting to see it, especially not right away. It's in our human nature to be blind. Accept it. Stop trying to look for signs of goodness. Stop trying to rush progress. Stop trying to find short cuts. It's gonna get you no where. Stop trying to look for happiness. Stop trying to look for happiness through other people. It all starts within. You have full control of your emotions and how you handle them. Being happy is possible.

Today was another great day. I'm not gonna lie, I was a little off due to some stuff, but it's okay. I'm happy and things happen for a reason. Timing just wasn't right. But I got to spend another sweet day with Karl and some other friends. Experienced one of thee best and CUTEST teachers ever! not to mention, one with a sense of humor. WSUP LANDSCAPE DESIGN. haha! I love it. Sat next to Devon? Packed class; but totally worth hiking that fcking mountain. Might as well, hit up that Health Center and get me some 10 condoms for a dollar type shit. HA. ohh no. Anyway, bonded with Karl some more, saw the Encinitas Boys and SAM! woo! Missed that bitch, freal. Practice was good too; ended by 12. [: I need to work harder. I need to put as much effort as I was in the beginning. I feel like I'm slacking off; and they could see it. Time to get back into it... before its too late. I will. It's a priority not to mention a responsibility I put on myself. I'm going to do it. I'm going to be better - no matter what anyone else says.

Goodnight world. Another day starts when I wake up. We'll see how this one goes. [: