My want list

Everyone has a list of things they want and every day that list alters either growing larger or smaller switching items rearranging them by their own personal desires. I have a list. And it ranges from Polly Pockets to Yachts and everything in between. However, although my desires for polly pockets and yachts remains, I know that it won't always be the same. My list changes. It grows, it shrinks, it rearranges. I'm starting a new chapter in my life - college. And I'm not even gonna lie, I'm so scared. That transition from being spoon-fed in high school to having to chose your own path in college is scaring every part of my body. It's like, all of a sudden a majority of things on my list means absolutely nothing at this point. I thought about it, and the things on my list won't prepare me for whats to come. So I've rearranged my priorities and switched some things around. And now... I've come up with a new list - My Need List. I've figured out that there were some things on my want list that are more important and should be considered more valuable. My Need List. It even sounds more important. I think I got a little carried away with my want list and now I found my own way to get what I need rather than wait for someone to give me what I want or wait for my wallet to go empty. I'm slowly learning to fend for myself and to rely only on myself. I'm slowly learning how to be an independent person and to be my own push. I'm slowly learning how to live and how to live for me alone. I've found that relying on people to be there for me isn't going to help me grow up. Taking matters into my own hands, being responsible and taking responsibility for my own actions, standing up for what I believe in whether alone or with company and staying strong for my own being needs my full and complete attention. Distractions are a given but I can't lose focus on my goal. Lately, my ideas have changed [a little] about temporary happiness. I guess you can argue that temporary happiness is still happiness. The only problem with that, in my opinion, is that it's only temporary, it's only going to last for so long.... and then what? Go back to being in the same state of mind as you were in before that temporary happiness kicked in? even with the possibility of being worse than when you actually started for those who aren't able to be strong enough to deal with the consequences. Another thing that I find so disturbing about the idea of temporary happiness is that at times, you don't even know if it's temporary or not until it's actually gone, right?! There are exemptions, I mean there are situations where you know that it going to be temporary. Take for example, the idea of drugs and addictions. They give you that temporary getaway that you feel that you need and can get through substances like those. Addictions, focusing your attention and convincing yourself that a simple stick of tobacco plus some eases your mind and helps you calm down. Using drugs, cigarettes and other addictions as a getaway from reality. Using them with the mindset that it "eases your pain" or "calms you down" or "takes your mind off of things", things you already convinced yourself you couldn't handle. Not because you are incapable, but because you ALLOW yourself to be weak about the situation instead of facing it, dealing with it and taking responsibility for your own actions. Or for others, "just something to do" or the whole idea of "it's so hard to stop." Not denying that it is, but what in life is easy. Nothing if you really think about it. Everything in life is still doable. I'm not trying to bash on those who smoke, do drugs or have any other addictions believe I'm not. I mean, out of all people... trust me that's not what I'm trying to do. All I'm saying is that you can make that switch if you really focused yourself on it. You can make that: "I should stop, I want to stop" idea and move is over to the other list and make it "I need to stop." That's what I like about this need list, every bullet point becomes a main priority and another main goal.